A Different Approach To Internet Challenges

My failure, thus far, to achieve a hip and trendy life notwithstanding, I persist in this aspiration. Having realized that the odds against traversing the classic routes to this goal, i.e., joining the Kardashian family or becoming a world famous rapper, have grown undeniably overwhelming, I’ve been researching a methodology that requires less talent and luck – the internet challenge.

It turns out that if one is willing to undergo one of these viral phenomena and upload a video of the experience, a moment of hip and trendy acclamation is indeed possible.

My studies, however, failed to reveal a consensus criteria of what exactly constitutes an “internet challenge” – other than the recording-uploading part. (Apparently, if a tree falls in a forest but no one makes a video of it, it may or may not make a sound but it certainly does not constitute an internet challenge.) Some challenges involve charitable contributions, some involve physical risk, some involve personal deprivation, some involve destroying property … , but I can’t derive a universally descriptive algorithm.

By the way – a disturbingly large number of challenges include, as a secondary criterion, “without vomiting” (e.g., The Banana Sprite challenge – a challenge to quickly eat two bananas and drink one can of Sprite without vomiting.” Source: Wikipedia). I don’t know about you, but I immediately lose interest in any activity, the description of which necessitates the specification, “without vomiting.” (If marriage vows included “without vomiting,” I would still be single.)

Finally, I realized that this ambiguity wasn’t a problem; it was an opportunity.

Which is why The Duchess & I have committed to the 2018 Return To Maui For Christmas challenge.

Hey, you can eat detergent pods if you want; we prefer munching  macadamias in Maui.

Photo atop post by slgckgc – Doing the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, CC BY 2.0, Wikimedia Commons

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