“Full Access To Impressive Grand Opening Pricing” – Most Impressive Meaningless Phrase In A 2018 Sales Letter

I received a letter last week announcing the Grand Opening of my car dealership at a new location. Well, it’s the car dealership where I take my car for servicing. I actually purchased my car eight years ago in Chicago. But, I’ve been pleased with the services I’ve received here in the Research Triangle of North Carolina. So, this isn’t just my bitching. It’s an ardent, albeit begrudging, sort of admiration.

First, however, take a look at the fonts used on the envelope above. On first – and maybe even second – glance, it looks like a hand-scrawled script from someone in Louisville. Heck, I know folks in Louisville. But, of course, the letter inside has nothing to do with Louisville.

In any case, I am most impressed with a phrase in the sales letter inside said envelope.

Yep, I’m invited to receive, from the Vice President of the dealership,

Full Access To Impressive Grand Opening Pricing


None of that “partial access” nonsense for this customer. Way cool, eh?

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